Appreciation – a simple word that holds immense power. More than merely saying thank you, true appreciation is the act of valuing someone or something, increasing their worth. And when we don’t show appreciation, we risk losing those people or things that we take for granted.
Think about it – when someone tells you that they appreciate you, how do you feel? You feel valued, important, and more motivated to continue doing whatever it is you’re doing. On the other hand, when someone fails to appreciate you, how does that make you feel? Undervalued, unimportant, and demotivated.
The same is true in relationships. When we show genuine appreciation for our loved ones, friends, and colleagues, we communicate that they hold value to us – that they are worth our time and effort. Conversely, when we don’t appreciate them for who they are and what they bring to our lives, we risk pushing them away.
Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. John 15:13
In John 15:13, we learn about the ultimate act of appreciation – laying down one’s life for another. While we may not all be called to make such a sacrifice, the sentiment behind it is powerful. It shows that appreciation is ultimately about putting others first, valuing them and their worth over our own desires or self-interest. Let me share a brief story with you about how appreciation has proven to be a valuable trait in someone’s life.
Once upon a time, there was a woman who worked hard every day to keep her family afloat. She worked long hours, took care of her children, and did everything in her power to provide for both her children and her husband. However, despite her best efforts, her husband never seemed to appreciate her. He never thanked her for her hard work, never acknowledged the sacrifices she made every day. Over time, the woman grew tired of feeling undervalued and unappreciated. Eventually, she made the difficult decision to leave her husband and start a new life.
Shocked that she made such a courageous and bold move, her husband struggled to understand why she no longer felt empowered to serve him in this manner. In many ways she felt as if she had invested years of her time in an area where she received no return on her investment. Over time she began to feel used, taken advantage of, and not worthwhile. While she loved her husband and children dearly, she had become empty. Much like a car that ran out of fuels, she felt that she could not go on like that any longer.
She started to wonder if someone could actually appreciate what she offered. After she moved on, she eventually attracted an incredible man, whom from the very start showed her how much he appreciated her. He valued who she was and what she consistently offered. What can we learn from this story? The value of appreciation cannot be overstated. When we fail to appreciate the people in our lives, losing them, is inevitable. Conversely, when we take the time to show genuine appreciation, we increase not only their value, but our own as well.
We should view appreciation as a powerful tool that, if used properly, can strengthen our relationships and increase the value of those we love. One of the main purposes to join any person in a relationship is to add value to their lives. Whether it’s a marital relationship, a friendship, or even a working relationship, your job is to add value. The person that you are adding value to has the high responsibility of showing how much they appreciate you, which in turn adds value to your life. Appreciation truly is a reciprocal sport. It goes both ways. From now on, take the time to show appreciation to the people in your life – it may be the key to keeping them close for the long haul.
Dr. Aaron Lewis, July 28, 2023